Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Jackassery Vote

Well, folks, seeing as it is January 31st, it is time to go back and look at who will be Hurricane Radio's first "Jackass of the Month" award. For the first month of 2006, we have four nominations, all coming within the first week.

Bill O'Reilly was nominated by Matt Ortega over at 2CW for the "War on Christmas/Buy My Friend's Book Campaign" that had folks all over the nation at each others' throats (as if we needed more family tension during the holidays/Chrismastime).

Pat Robertson was nominated by yours truly for saying that Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon's stroke and coma was punishment from God for the Israeli withdrawal from Gaza. (I wonder who God voted for, Fatah or Hamas...I'm sure Pat has an answer to that one too.)

Matt Leinart was nominated by Dante for being classless and saying USC was the better team and that Texas just got the breaks in winning the College Football National Championship. Sore Losermatt.

Harry Belafonte was nominated by SAWB for being a rich American who hates America and went to hang with Veneauelan President* Hugo Chavez to say so. Gerorge Bush a terrorist? Ol' Dubya's a lot of things, Harry, and I don't like him either, but saying crap like that is just irresponsible.

So here's how the voting will go: make a comment on this post. Vote for the one Jackass you think is the biggest.

Or you can vote on all of them 1-4 (1 = biggest jackass, 4 being the smallest jackass) and I'll rank 'em like the AP Poll in College Football. Nominators can vote again, but if they don't their nomination will count as one vote.


Patrick Armstrong said...

So I'll get the ball rolling, and I'm ranking them AP style:

1. Bill O' Reilly (people were yelling "MERRY CHRISTMAS" at me)

2. Matt Leinart (sportsmanship, buddy. Learn it.)

3. Harry Belafonte (like there aren't worse things, based in fact, to say about Ol' Dubya)

4. Pat Robertson. (maybe that's just how he acts, considering his entire career...)

S.A.W.B. said...

1 - Belafonte - Send us your money, Harry, if you hate it here so bad...
2 - Robertson - Let's be a little more responsible with the 'word of Jeebus'...
3 - O'Reilly - Did you really need to add fuel to that fire, Bill? And you wonder why your ratings are down...
4 - Leinart - Spoiled Quarterback boy will not find it so easy to succeed wherever he lands in the draft...

Dante said...

1. Matt Leinart - Hey, it's the only #1 spot he could get.

2. Harry Belafonte - Belafonte is only an amateur (much like Leinart). The other two on the list make money off their jackassery. Belafonte does it for the love of the game. If Belafonte tries to throw out a new album or concert tour in the wake of his popularity/infamy, then I'll drop him to #4.

3. Pat Robertson - Who wants to throw money in a betting pool for how long it takes Pat Robertson or one of his loved ones to get a stroke? Why is Robertson even taking a hard line of Israel anyways? Didn't they kill Jesus?

4. Bill O'Reilly - This jackass makes his entire living off of jackassery. I just can't rank him very high in light of this.

dadvocate said...

I'll cast a singe vote to Matt Leinart.

I think the others are suffering from senility.

Laddi said...

1. Belafonte - It's one thing to be ignorant (Robertson), in denial of facts (Leinart), or just a plain ol' buttplug (O'Reilly), but to be all three in one statement is really really impressive.

2. Matt Leinart - NO crybabies!

3t. Bill O'Reilly, Pat Robertson - You could give them both lifetime achievement award in the realm of jackassery.

Matt O. said...

1 - O'Reilly (God I hate that guy)

2 - Belafonte (don't try to help, you're only hurting us)

3 - Matt Leinart (stick up your butt much?)

4 - Pat Robertson (mentally ill disqualifies you from this award)

petallic said...

1.Pat Robertson - Allegedly, they're friends, which makes his comments not just sacreligious but a betrayal of the bonds of friendship. Two strikes.

2. Belafonte- Grizzard is mumbling in his grave...I can hear him...something about Delta being ready.

3. O'Reilly - Because I had to endure awkwardness at both work and school, where my FRIENDS took his side.

4. Leinart - because there's little class in professional sports anyway.

patsbrother said...

As one whose actions have been described as both "jackassery" and "assholery", I take mild offense at this Jackassery Vote. Other than caucasian and presumptive, I feel Mr. Robertson and I belong in separate categories altogether.

1. Pat Robertson. The reason I'll never complain about Bush Jr.. (For those who may be confused, the current President is George III.)

2. Pat Robertson. Because I neither know nor care who Matt Leinart is.

3. Bill O'Reilly. Because if you're going to manufacture a controversy from a soundstage in Manhattan, show some chutzpah and wag the freaking dog.

4. Pat Robertson. Because I feel ballot-stuffing is my duty as a Democrat.

I support Harry Belafonte's right as a private citizen to an opinion. Unlike the gentlemen mentioned in my four votes, Mr. Belafonte did not try to mask that opinion as reportable news. I will remind you all Mr. Belafonte is a folk singer. You can't name a folk singer who hasn't called a President a terrorist at some point or another.

Patrick Armstrong said...

Update 2/01/06

Voting will close at midnight Friday, but here's the current tally:

1. Harry Belafonte

2. Matt Leinart

3.(tie) Bill O'Reilly
3. (tie) Pat Robertson

5. Others Recieving Votes

patsbrother said...

I am confused by paT's method of counting votes. Perhaps his proximity to Florida perverts his objectivity...

Using a 4.0 scale (such as school grades: top vote=4, second=3, third=2, fourth=1, not vote=0), this would be the result:

1. Pat Robertson (21)

2. Harry Belafonte (19)

3. Matt Leinhart (17)
3. Bill O'Reilly (17)

I did not register any "write ins". If double votes did not count (and there is no reason why they shouldn't), Mr. Robertson would have come in at 17, in what would then be a three-way tie for second.

Patrick Armstrong said...

Ye Sproute Spoketh:

"Using a 4.0 scale (such as school grades: top vote=4, second=3, third=2, fourth=1, not vote=0),"

"If double votes did not count (and there is no reason why they shouldn't)"

No reason? I'll give you one:

"you can vote on all of them 1-4 (1 = biggest jackass, 4 being the smallest jackass) and I'll rank 'em like the AP Poll in College Football." -HR

Double votes don't count in the AP Poll in College Football (last time I checked, anyway).

Though I will double check the final results with SAWB, just to be fair and balanced.

patsbrother said...

It seems, having no concept of how the AP poll is conducted, I unconsciously excised that line from the blog.

Or I just presumed to write off a comment without reading the post. Which is more likely.


But now, please explain mathematically how such accounting proceeds.

[This request is not a joke. Sad but true, I find the math far more interesting than the sport.]

S.A.W.B. said...

My math has it as follows - (4pts for a 1st place vote, 3 for second, etc...ties are split as such - tie for first would be 3.5pts each, second would be 2.5, third is 1.5)

1 - Harry Belafonte - 19pts
2 - Matt Leinart - 18pts
3t - Pat Robertson - 16.5pts
3t - Bill O'Reilly - 16.5pts

Dante said...

How sad. Even in a poll of biggest jackasses, Leinart can only seem to come in 2nd place.