Wednesday, June 14, 2006

The Final Frontier

You know what tells me that the US is above and beyond? The fact that we actually have Spaceport construction being held up by the bureaucracy. That is a testament to both how advanced we are and how all encompassing the red tape is.

I just have this vision of some bespectacled dude with a clipboard talking on the com-link to Captain Jean-Luc Picard; "Sorry, Captain, if you want to fly the Starship Enterprise through this star system, you're going to have to call the DMV..."

But, we can't have something cool without some controversey, right? The Rebel Flag debate goes orbital, and the Russians are to blame. Dadgum Russkies, rilin' up all our American sensitivity & s***.

And while we're busy red taping and hypersensitizing space, France can't even figure out how to fly a plane.

9 comments:

Dante said...

I think your vision seems a bit off because it involves Star Trek. That's not our future. Everyone knows the real future is for our planet to get bulldozed down to make room for an interstellar bypass. More than enough red tape to go around there.

Ruskies with Rebel Flags? That Cosmonaut wasn't the Eastern European from Euro-Trip, was he?

patsbrother said...

Two things:

#1: "You know what tells me that the US is above and beyond?"

Something tells me Pat didn't forget to type out an additional word or words at the end of that sentence, which means he's possibly learning syntax from "Clueless". As if.

#2: Having never expressed concern over traditional aviation's high degree of regulation, Pat now insensibly paints the regulation of space flight as needless bureaucracy. Huh?

Patrick Armstrong said...

Wow. Nothing says 'serious post' like using the Starship Enterprise as an example, making an inane dig at France, and having Dante's rebuttal come from the Hitchhikers's Guide to the Galaxy.

patsbrother said...

And yet reference to an Alicia Silverstone movie is beyond the pale.

Dante said...

Well Pat, when you talk about science fiction and red tape, it's hard not to think of the Vogons. At least we aren't discussing poetry. A few episodes of Doctor Who also come to mind but I've learned long ago that Americans just don't like Doctor Who. He's like a British Jon Lovitz.

There's also a hidden Dukes of Hazzard reference in there if you look hard enough.

liberalandproud said...

"I just have this vision of some bespectacled dude with a clipboard talking on the com-link to Captain Jean-Luc Picard . . ."

Spectacles? Clipboard? By Picard's century, I'm pretty sure technology has gotten past these things. After all, Geordi is able to see by wearing some suped-up banana clip over his eyes. I doubt anyone will be wearing spectacles.

I know, I know, I am the biggest nerd ever.

Dante said...

"I doubt anyone will be wearing spectacles."

Captain Kirk wore spectacles in Star Trek II. What if Picard is also allergic to Retinax 5? And you thought you were the biggest nerd ever.

VDOPM said...

I think Dubai beat us on this one IIRC...

Patrick Armstrong said...

Next thing you know, there will be loud public outrage about the administration selling control of our Spaceports to "Dubai Sub-Orbital Shipping, LLC."