Friday, May 08, 2009

More Hustle

There were some weekends in my life that went by in a blur. Hell, there were some weeks in my life that went by in a blur. But even in a blur, there are things you remember. Especially when someone else picks up the tab.

Let me explain: One weekend, lo these many years hence, it came to pass that on a single spring day in Athens, Georgia, the University of Georgia's football team had an intrasquad game on the same day that the Classic City Brew Fest was held at the Classic Center down the street. You know the day has gone by in a blur when you leave a festival celebrating beer and go to a pub to sober up. That plan was wrecked, yea, by one large and ragingly intoxicated Georgia alum named Lloyd. While he only appeared to have previously met 5 individuals at the bar, this good hearted and jolly soul went ahead and purchased over $7000 in drinks for his 5 friends, me and my friends, and the other 100 people who came through the bar that evening.

That was the single most expensive drinking day of my life, and I remember who paid for what, and I have witnesses who will back this up as True. True.

All I'm sayin' is, if someone spotted me and my family a trip to Hawaii, and then hooked me up with a trip to Jamaica, I'd remember every little detail.

But that's just me. As far as others are concerned, results may vary.



Dante said...

I still remember sitting in the bar with Travis when Lloyd started buying rounds. Our conversation went something like this:

Lloyd: "Get some tequila for these guys!"
Me: "Oh no."
Travis: "What's wrong you don't like tequila?"
Me: "No, I really like tequila."
Lloyd: "Shake my hand! Feel that grip?! Snap into a Slim Jim!" (Ok, he really didn't say that last sentence. That was Randy savage but it gives the proper characterization for Lloyd.)

At some point I started spitting on people and even slapped Mikey once (all in good fun in my mind at the time).

Jerz took me to the men's room to throw up and in the middle of telling him I didn't have to throw up, I started throwing up in the urinal. That's ok though. The bar went way past the threshold of tequila sales that requires severe bathroom cleanup. If it wasn't me, it would've been someone else. I believe Disney destroyed the "family" bathroom that same night. Not sure who got the ladies room but it was heavily tagged.

The wife has more amusing stories from that night than I do as I don't really recall the later bits all that well. I recall Bob hiding and then trying to ride home in the back of the van. I was a champion the next morning though and woke up at 8:30 to make breakfast for everyone staying at our house.

If I remember correctly, Pat and I both left our credit cards at the bar that night and showed up at the same time the next day to settle tabs (or was that another night?).

I actually saw Lloyd about a week later at the Logans Steakhouse. I didn't stop by his table to say hi. I haven't seen him since.

Cousin Pat from Georgia said...

(People who were not there, bear in mind that the events described happened after we had been drinking for four hours)

Jerz and I arrived early with the intention of getting buffalo burgers and drinking water. The plan was to cool off for a minute and then resume drinking (beers) later.

We sat at the bar, right in between Lloyd and three of his friends to our left. The craziness began in a subtle way, with talk of football, and Lloyd offered to buy a round for toasting. Jerz got that face like Daniel had just walked in the room, but who says no to a pint? Once both fresh brews had arrived, one of Lloyd's friends could handle no more tequila, so he and I switched beverages, I slammed the shot and the evening began in earnest.

Suddenly, Travis & co were there, and Lloyd was enraged that he had now bought shots for Clemson fans.

I do remember Mikey arriving late, because he had been down the street with Daniel, and the look of terror on his face when he saw the lot of us as he walked in. At the time, Lloyd was hollering a loud toast about a large grey eagle shitting on the North because of what they did to the South during the war, and everyone in the room had their glasses raised.

Fun times.

(However, the night we both left our credit cards was in the fall of 2000, after a loss to Auburn in Auburn, and we had all been at the GA Theatre watching the brutal, seesaw game that ended in overtime.)

Dante said...

Oh, that was Auburn Overtime night. You guys were at the Theater. Gary, Disney, and I were at Uptown. I knew the bartender and she was basically giving me 3 shots of neat rye for every one I ordered since nobody else ever drank it. When you start the night off with rye shots and endure a narrow Georgia loss that would've kept them alive in the SEC East (especially since Spurrier lost earlier that evening), there's nowhere to go but down.